Originally Posted by TruckerPete
You seem like a witty, intelligent nerd. Sounds great to me; I can't be the only one who thinks so!
I agree!!! I also think the internet thing is very helpful with the flirting because I dont feel soo pressured to say something witty right away. I have also had hubby say "Whats the worst they can say?? That they aren't interested? Then you say well thanks anyway and walk away" but honestly that isn't the worst they can say. They can give that look that many women are pros at that says "Really?? DO you think I would sleep with you?" or even worse, they could say "What are you a freak??" or even so much worse she could say "I would have sex with him but I am not interested in you in any way"!
He is much less analytical about things, he tends to take the thought of "If everyone is/seems happy, and noone is crying, screaming, blowing up, he figures there isn't much to really discuss about the relationship. He sees no reason to find out why he feels a certain way, he feels that way, that is the way it is and not much need to look further, whereas me and Slutty Unicorn sit for hours sometimes and talk about the relationship, it is sometimes like we are little scientists looking at the minutia of our lives and his behavior and seeing what it is that makes him tick.
Today we had a conversation about how she is learning about him from me. I know him better then anyone in the world, but I recognize I don't know everything about him. I just found out today that he doesn't like hot dogs wrapped in croissants when I offered to make them and he said "Honestly I don't really like them, since we decided that honesty is of the utmost importance in this relationship it should apply to everything I would think." I was soo proud of him, he was willing to tell me that something he had previously eaten and hated bothered him. I know this may seem like a small thing but for him, who is always giving me "It's ok, no big deal, it doesn't matter".
SluttyUnicorn (Our GF changed her name from TrustyNatasha to SluttyUnicorn on here for those playing the home game) and DaJoshy (hubby) and I were talking about how she is learning about him from me. She put her hands together and said "Teach me master" and that lead to DJ talking about his schoolgirl fantasy (one I knew about but hadn't really thought of in a long time, but I think because he is having NRE he is more horny (although for a time he hadn't had sex with either of us because of the issues between Slutty Unicorn and I, he very much felt caught in the middle. ) I often asked him to please get rid of her, then the next day I would say "You know, I really do love her and the little girl", so he knew that my meltdowns over stupid little things weren't my true feelings.
He knew that if he sent them away I would be upset and want them back. I always do. Even when they don't particularly like me, because honestly, DaJoshy is much nicer (not that he isn't nice of course) but he is so much more loving toward me when he has other women in his life. It also seems to help having someone else there to say "Now that wasn't fair" or "Be nice" when the often sarcastic and tongue in cheek comments get a little too close ot the bone. I have started to enjoy stepping back and letting them have their relationship. Once again, dont loose hope, it is hard, it is fun, it is great, and it is worth it.