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Old 07-18-2011, 06:16 PM
RobertCourage RobertCourage is offline
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 68

Regarding the freedom comments, heres some data to help clarify the picture.

How things are today (and have been for a while) - I travel Monday through Thursday. I am typically home Friday through Sunday. When needed I modify my schedule to support the family (big events. Important doctors visits. Etc.). When I am home I do all I can to help with the kids, the chores etc. I think that is my responsibility and I dont mind doing it.

I asked my wife if she wanted me to find a job where I would be home more. This would mean less in one and more time for her to deal with me. Her decision was to have things stay the way they are because it keeps me out of her hair and gives her time to be with T and keeps our financial situation stable So given that decision I have a hard time with her complaining about a lack of support.

If I move out (separation) I don't know where I would go. Probably her parents house or a cheap rental. She would still have the kids all week while i travel. Then I would come home and take ownership of the kids b would likely have to be at the house to do so (since the house would still need maintenance - grass, pool, cleaning, etc.). So she would have to disappear on the weekends while I was home taking care of things. And I would then leave at night and go sleep somewhere else. That would be the arrangement. So the freedom she would gain is when I am home and she is not on the weekends. Her Monday through Thursday would be the same (which sucks during summer but summer only has 7 weeks left). Then the kids go back to school and her days become a little easier.

So there's no easy answer to the logistics of this. And the impact on the kids is paramount. This is when I wonder if separation makes sense. My repsonsibilities at home remain unchanged, the kids are deeply affected and my wife's week is unaffected. Which means it's almost easier for me to suck it up, stay at home, keep the kids oblivious, and occasionally have nice moments with my wife (and occasionally want to die because of the impossibility of the situation)

Sorry for the long note. I am at work and my brain is going a mile a minute and that's reflected here!
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