thanks for your best wishes for our situation!
I know for me that sometimes what I think I want isn't always what I actually want or need. But if what I think I want is taken from me or I can't have it for some reason, it makes me want it even more...
I wonder if this could be true for RBR. Perhaps the only way to find out is to completely let her go to pursue her own thing and then time will tell what the both of you really want and if that involves your relationship together or not...
I wish you all the best too!