By the time morning came around, I had decided that this relationship might or might not work out in the end, but it wasnt going to not work out because of a blowup on my part. I had yelled at and been just plain horrible to my entire family for over a week. This was all caused by fear, and jealousy and insecurity, but it was upsetting none the less. TB (girlfriends daughter) had crawled into bed with the two of them, and I walked past the open bedroom door and thought "See, if I left he could have his nice little family he has always wanted" but I stopped myself and said "you know, this is the happy family I have always wanted too" and decided that I needed some way to apologize in a way other then words. I made the three of them breakfast in bed while they slept. I woke them all up to bcon and eggs in bed, (cereal and bacon for the little on who doesnt like eggs) and I apologized to all of them for being so horrible and mean and yelling, and told them I couldnt promise I would never do it again, but that we would work out a better way to prevent or diffuse them when they do happen.
Our dryer had broken down, and while we technically could afford a new one this week, it would be tight and would be helpful to put off buying a new dryer this week and save up for a new washer AND dryer, both badly needed, dryer moreso of course, but to do that we needed to get the laundry that had been piling up done. I decided that I would go to the laundrymat (a very large physical task for me as I am disabled) and although GF was planning on going with me, I felt that she needed to spend time alone with hubby after the hard night that she had had last night. They were all tired (I had gotten my second wind after having not slept all night) so I left them all home alone. The three of them were going back to sleep, having not had to get out of bed due to the breakfast in bed I made, and before I left I said "Call me to let me know your thinkin of me".
I went to the laundrymat and did the laundry, about 9 loads, and while I was folding the 3rd of the 9 loads, GF called and asked what point I was at, I said "about 1/3 of the way through the folding" and she said "are you standing there folding it all??" I said "Yeah of course!" she said "put it in the baskets and bags and bring them home, we will fold them together and put them away" which I was eternally grateful for as I was hurting, tired, hungry (I didnt make myself breakfast) so I came home and ate something then went to get some sleep.
I dont know that this will all work out, noone does, but we will give it our best try, and make sure that if it doesnt work out, everyone is better off for having had the experience.