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Old 07-14-2011, 03:10 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,398

Originally Posted by RobertCourage View Post
Thanks Neon. I would love for her to post her side of the story here, but she is very private and would probably be completely pissed at me if she saw what I was posting.
Too bad!

To your point, she is not a bad person. I would not be married for so long to a bad person. I think she is lost and struggling with her mid-life identify crisis. And I understand that and appreciate it. I really do. I just wish she had the ability to better deal with crisis. Maybe it is because after all these years I am the only one she had to dump on when things get rough. And I am an exceptionally easy target since I am not home enough and they are in fact my children that are driving her nuts.
Your (plural) children. Do you get babysitters and get out for dates much? It helps.

I am just in so much emotional pain. More than ever in my life.
I understand completely. My first foray into poly was equally painful.

And I am a very fair and honest person and this just doesn't seem fair. I know liife isnt always fair - but that doesnt make it any easier to accept that I am not good enough for her and that she needs time to 'figure out her happiness'. I don't get that opportunity! I have to go to work, make the money, and support the family. Period. I don't have the luxury of asking the world to stop while i figure out my happiness.
I'm sorry Robert, but that is a lame excuse. An unexamined life isn't worth living.

My ex used to hand me that bs. We broke up, he got laid off and had a good year and a half to break down and start to rebuild. But not until circumstances forced it. There's no time like the present. It's all we've got.

But you know what? As this thing eventually comes to an end, whatever end that may be, I will be changing my perspective on my happiness and will be more selfish about what I want in the future...

I am convinced the decision will be to divorce. She is far too unhappy with the life I have given her.
That's sexist. You built your lives together, she made choices and so did you.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 62)
Pixie (poly, F, 40) together since 2009
My bf Kahlo (single, poly-friendly, M, 45) since August 2017
Master, (mono, M, 36), Pixie's bf for 3+ years
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