Progress! I managed to say it in the least threatening, most laid back way possible. Eric sent an email to me and to Gia's best friend K, thanking us for all of our help and saying what a difference it's made (it was very sweet). I wrote back and said "Hey, you know that both K and I love the three of you very much and we're here to back you up however you need. Don't hesitate to reach out." So yeah, I actually wrote the words, albeit couched in terms of the love of a friend and love for a child.
Maybe some day, in the words of Dr. Horrible, I'll make "a real, audible connection" with him on the subject.
But for now, even though he probably didn't even take notice of exactly what I wrote, I at least feel like I've opened up to a new level of honesty in this situation.
I get to see them again tonight!! I can't wait to hold Bee and to see how Gia is holding up.