Hello, I'm going to the funny farm! Or am already there. My gf and I went to her father's the other night, he is lifetime poly and we met with him and his partner. We sought out their advice and we came away after a lot of crying and processing with a solution to my problem of needing to meet the other woman. I have been hoping that by meeting the other woman I will at least be able to lessen the jealousy and angst when they are together. The other woman did not want to meet me and finally agreed. I wanted to meet alone and on neutral ground for the reasons that it would but us on an equal plane, we wouldn't be able to imagine that our gf treated either of us better than the other or any other imagined issues. The other woman, does not want to meet me but will if the gf is there. I stepped back from my need for it to be alone and neutral in hopes of moving forward. My need was for this meeting to happen before the two of them are together again so i don't go through another night vomiting and suffering from panic attacks. God knows if i didn't love my gf I would have bailed long ago. I don't want anyone hurt but I feel I have a right to stick to this request. I want to meet her before. The other woman is poised to break up with my gf over the demand. She says she feels manipulated. I don't know what to do. Part of me would be so freakin happy if she did break up with the gf because our plans are to go back and try monogamy if that relationship ends. The other part of me does not want my gf suffering and grieving the lose of that relationship. That relationship is a couple months old, gf and I are coming up on 2 years 8 months. I just can't lose her, i feel insane. I appreciate any help you can give me and I'm so sorry if i am a bore, i have nobody to talk to about this.