Did you have a question of some kind? Can I ask you some questions?
My first thought is WHY? WHY would you end this?! This arrangement sounds fantastic to me. He has a great guy that he is not sexual with but loves dearly and has you who he obviously to me seemed to really be loving also. Why not create more love in the world and be together.... love is not meant to be capped as far as I am concerned... its meant to expand as far as it can. Its the whole idea of abundance rather than scarcity. You could have a great boyfriend and a really great metamour in his other partner. There is a lot to share in that! Its community, family, a tribal thing... all awesome if you give it a chance.
This anxiety, did you sit with it? Walk yourself through it? Really jump right in it and swim around to see what it was about? Was it our monogamous programming that caused it? Was it fear of abandonment? Fear of being too "out there?" What was behind it and is it not possible to get to the bottom of it and learn something from it while still keeping your relationship.... I dunno. To me it seems you have missed out on an opportunity here.
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