I still don't know what you mean by "group settings." Please, if you're talking about group sex and threesomes, say GROUP SEX and THREESOMES! If you're talking about just hanging out as a group, please be specific about what you want to do. It helps everyone here to be able to offer encouragement, feedback, or advice IF WE KNOW WHAT IT IS YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! Thanks.
(Or maybe it's me who just isn't getting it)
But please take care not to be so critical of yourself. Have compassion for what you're going through. You're okay!