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Old 06-29-2011, 11:29 PM
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River River is offline
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: NM, USA
Posts: 2,164

Originally Posted by Tinyblu View Post
But I'm afraid he's going to dump me if I tell him that I am not ready to be pushed into another possible group sex situation just yet.
If he "dumped" you in this way, you're surely better off without him. The vibe I'm getting here is that the two of you need to work on establishing trust in yourselves and each other before proceeding with challenging way-out edges. If you say, "Honey, this doesn't feel safe, doesn't feel good, is not timely, isn't me...", and he doesn't embrace you with tenderness and understanding, he's not all he's being cracked up to be. So give yourself what you need. His "needs" are not more important than your own -- not in a loving relationship.

One more thing: Sex is overrated. In the context of loving relationships, sex is wonderful. But sex cannot quench the thirst of the heart. Loving can -- with and/or without sex.

We always must give ourselves love in the measure we're needing it, so we can open to sharing it with another unproblematically. Sometimes we have to declare our dignity and hope the other will take that as an opportunity to perceive it. And if they do not, love yourself enough to move on or change the situation somehow.
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Last edited by River; 06-29-2011 at 11:33 PM.
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