Ahh, Ignorant, that was a very good summary. I hear that you feel betrayed that you gave him an opening years ago to explain and explore his bisexuality, and he didnt take you up on it. Now, years later, he feels braver and more trusting of you to tell you of his deepest desires and fears.
I applaud your decision to not hang onto resenting that he wasn't completely honest and open with you in the past. You might consider he probably was in a lot of denial to himself, and therefore couldn't be more open with you!
Now, it seems like he is projecting a bit. He is perhaps casting blame on you as a judge, when really, he is afraid of being bi, and judging his own desires as wrong, sinful, risky in our culture.
This is a time of transition for both of you. Keep up the good work talking, be respectful and gentle and let love lead the way.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw
me: Mags, female, pansexual, 59, loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, 37