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Old 06-26-2011, 09:20 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

It seems to me that your rage was mostly about you wanting to set the rules, which weren't followed according to how you thought they should. Or something else - it could've been the straw that broke the camel's back of unexpressed anger. I mean, to be in a rage over blurry or bad pics that were taken by tired people would seem quite an over-reaction, so I would say that reason was really just a "cover" for something underneath it all.

We all want some sense of control over what's happening in our lives, forgetting that that is an illusion. Especially when we deeply care about someone, it is very difficult to give up the reins. So, I think this was a good experience for you because now you have been given a clue about what to watch for in yourself - a need to control and hold on tightly or of not owning up to what's really going on in yourself. My guess is that these things show up in other areas of your life, not just relationships.

I am very glad that the two of you communicated about it and it did not fester and become a stumbling block for you. Sometimes we have to own up to our own ugliness in order to see the beauty we have in our lives. Good work!
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.

Last edited by nycindie; 06-26-2011 at 10:36 PM.
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