Originally Posted by Magdlyn
Demands sounds a bit concerning. What do you imagine you'd "demand?"
When it comes to her eventually having sex, all I demand is that she takes necessary steps to protect herself and me. We are not even close to them spending a night together, much less having sex yet, but by removing myself from that equation, I give her back control over her life. She's not controlled directly by me, but rather by how she feels about pushing her own boundaries, and balancing that against how much pain I might be in at that particular point in time.
Realistically I will never move along a linear path and go "Now, NOW you can have sex" and then a week later "NOW you can spend the night". I realise that's *really* not how this works.
Down the line, further than just the month we've been doing this, some days I might be fine with it, some I won't be and when I'm not, I can tell her how I feel. She'll know then that she can have it her way some days, others not. Just like anything else in a relationship.