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Old 06-26-2011, 07:36 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
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Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
I'm not into cuddling with platonic friends, either. I would always feel like there is some pretense or dishonesty there.

I really dislike the whole idea of cuddle parties with strangers, 'cause I am sure at least some people are just pretending they want to keep it non-sexual and something inappropriate would happen. And that would piss me off. I don't think I could relax at all if I joined one.

Since learning about poly and discovering cuddle parties, I even find it a huge turn-off to hear (or read) grown-ups talking about cuddling. It's like the word is tainted for me now. I cannot explain it, but I get really irritated with the whole "cuddle movement," so to speak.

It's funny that the idea makes me uneasy because, back in the late 80s/early 90s, I did participate in what we called "puppy piles" with a close-knit group that I was connected with (we were all trained in an alternative healing modality) and it was wonderful. Basically, we all hugged each other in a pile together, but it was always organized within the context of certain gatherings we held within the community. But we all had a common language and a well-established basis of trust amongst the group. However, I wouldn't have gone and cuddled with any of those people on personal time outside of those workshops/celebrations, etc. We never called it cuddling.
That is so interesting! What's behind all that do you think? I see cuddle parties and puppy piles as the same thing. How are they different for you?

I'm not a big cuddler really. I get touched out at work I think (I work with people who have cognitive disabilities). In fact I told PN tonight that he had to get a girlfriend just so he could go over to her place and maul her while she made dinner I just don't like it much really.

Cuddle parties would not be something I go to I don't think. To me it would mean the lead up to a sex party. I dunno, I've never gone to one though, I really don't know what it would be like
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