Just an update for those kind enough to give me advice
I had a rather emotionally charged conversation with my DP recently, mostly down the the fact that when he's stressed, he just retreats into himself. And at the moment, since we're living with his parents while we have work done on the house and he is running his own business (which is flourishing), he is VERY stressed.
I'm very much a get-it-off-my-chest kind of girl, but he is the exact opposite. He won't talk to me AT ALL. Even small talk feels like a battle. And being the kind of person who loves to chat about anything and everything, it was making me feel totally alone. He was suffocating me with his silence.
So we had words. I cried, and told him I was sick of begging him to be open and honest with me. He shows me he loves me in a million different ways; he does everything for me. But I don't WANT him to do everything for me! I can do most of it myself! I just want his company. I just want to listen to him speak.
Is that so much to ask?
He is trying a little, it seems. We went out for a meal last night while his parents watched the baby, and we got a few things out in the open...but polyamory still remains ghosted out of our conversation.
I am so tired of this. I want to point him in the direction of this site, but I am sick of feeling like I'm dragging him kicking and screaming. He promised he would bring it up and ask me questions. HE PROMISED. But still...NOTHING. I feel so alone