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Old 06-23-2011, 11:57 AM
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vixtresses vixtresses is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: South Florida
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OK, our resolve not to have sex until STD test results came back completely dissolved last night. We both (Knight and I) had gone to get tested that day, and were just waiting to see what the results were... I went to his place last night after class, things got hot and heavy, one thing led to another, and... well, you know how this ends. We started out with a condom, but finished without one (I know, I know, totally defeats the purpose of having one).

I think I was a little too idealistic when I set those particular boundaries. I should know myself better than that... I've never liked condoms. I know, I know! They're basic protection, essential, etc., but... sex just doesn't feel the same with a condom. It just doesn't. The friction's different, there are weird sloshy, squeaky noises with a condom, the material bunches up and chafes... Excuses, excuses, I know.

Anyway, I did tell Romeo. He wasn't upset or surprised that we had sex, but he did say he was upset that we didn't use a condom. He said it in a sort of teasing way, so I couldn't quite tell how upset he was exactly, but I believe him when he says he was upset. We decided to hold off on having sex ourselves until Knight's and my results come in. I'm skeptical that'll actually work... Romeo's and my resolve to do things properly in the sex department has always sucked, too. We tried using condoms once upon a time, too, and soon gave them up because we both hated them.

Honestly, though, I'm trying to beat myself up about this and I'm still too stupid-smiley from the sex last night to even feel very bad about it. I am fairly confident Knight's clean - he gets tested every six months anyway. If anything, I'm the one to worry about, since I've never been tested, and he knows that and my sexual history.

Bah. Clearly, I suck at being a good poly.
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