Originally Posted by redsirenn
I am a firm believer that life is not fair, and that NO ONE can place a time frame on how long they are "supposed" to feel insecure, not ready, whatever... 3 weeks is virtually NO time, especially for two people who do not see each other frequently due to work, etc.
I agree that 3 weeks is perhaps a short time to expect to "get over" emotions. Especially when they are around something that cannot change. You can't change that O broke his agreement with you so those emotions may linger.
I do think that at a certain point it is worth addressing why you are holding on to those emotions however... or why anyone holds on to emotions. Sometimes they get stuck there and just pushed aside instead of dealt with. They get sucked up, swept under the carpet and all but forgotten, until another situation comes up whereby they are dredged up again and have more power because they are added to the new situation. (really I'm just saying this as an over all observation, rather than directly about your posts)
I would wonder if it wouldn't be in your best interest to look head on at this woman and take the bull by the horns and just go there on your trip. I know it's about you and your "baggage" left in Seattle, also about gaining trust between the two of you, but there is nothing that says trust building and getting rid of baggage than dealing with everything all at once and seeing once and for all what your relationship is made of.
I get this over all feeling that your relationship is built on sand and the illusion of something solid. I sense some shaky fear in your posts and wonder if you need to challenge yourself and him bit more rather than taking these tiny steps towards the prospect of a future.