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Old 06-22-2011, 01:46 PM
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River River is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: NM, USA
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Default Compassionate Ocean

Originally Posted by AutumnalTone View Post
Interesting. I'm not certain letting go is the thing so much as holding onto one's self is. If one can hold on--firmly--to a sense of self-worth, then the bad person stories lose their power.
Thank you for the opportunity to examine a crucial distinction (in my own heart and mind), AT. As I read your comment, I looked carefully at the words. Initially, you have "holding onto one's self," and a little later holding on to "self-worth".

What I am actually experiencing, and practicing, is the letting go of myself, while allowing the fullness of my value / worth / essence to emerge in my life. Holding onto myself has caused me nothing but pain and suffering, and I'm so tired of it that I want to let myself go, entirely.

Paradoxically, letting myself go doesn't mean that I'm becoming more boundary-diffuse in an unhealthy way. It's true that we need good "boundaries" in order to function well in relationships of every kind. I'm becoming no less assertive -- though my assertiveness is much more tender than it used to be. I'm becoming no less committed to things. I'm not really losing anything of what I am in letting myself go. Rather, what I am is emerging as a joyful, growing freedom. By letting myself go I am becoming who and what I am. I'm allowing astonishing wonderous life to tease me ever more open and kind and truthful and couragious.... This process is so freaking marvelous and healing and good that I wish it upon everyone! I wish
clouds would rain this upon all of us! Wet us down with letting ourselves go.

It looks to me that when I or anyone let ourselves go, in this way, our self-worth grows by leaps and bounds. Because we are not a thimble full of water in need of protection; we are the very Ocean itself.
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