Originally Posted by Minxxa
Have you sat down with him and discussed your feelings?
Yep, too many times. I haven't seen him since it happened, but will tonight. That's why I came here wondering how others have handled these things. He has made some changes -- he's now honest right after he breaks our boundaries. So, the lying is gone. But, stopping the cheating hasn't. For him, it's still an aspiration, but for me, it's basic. Another unfortunate piece is that his behavior is ripping open old wounds for me from childhood. I know they are separate issues intellectually, but I experience them together physically/emotionally, at least at first. It makes me paralyzed for days.
BTW, I've been reading a lot of the postings here that deal with this issue (and in general, this forum is great). There's not many threads with concrete advice, but maybe that's just how it is. I just don't know what to do. Is it reasonable to ask someone to get counseling? Should we take some time apart? My BF knows and is pressing for forgiveness, but he's an easy soul that way and he doesn't have to deal with the cheating first hand. *sigh* Maybe these posts sound fairly rational, but I feel sick to my stomach atm.