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Old 06-19-2011, 05:04 PM
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Breathesgirl Breathesgirl is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 833

The fact is that yes, it IS hard to get out of an abusive relationship. It is hard but is doable once you get tired of the abuse AND find some self esteem so you will be able to do what seems to be undoable.

The situation is different for everyone , this is true.

The hardest part of escaping is finding that self esteem which the abuser has been beating out of you (whether it's physically, emotionally, mentally, a combination or something else altogether) for what seems like forever and then some! It doesn't take a lot of self esteem to get out but it does take just a little bit. Most of us have to dig under years of baggage and shit to find even a half gram of it to fuel us in the right direction.

What it took for me was an online friend who simply talked to me, helped me acknowledge what I already knew, listened when I was having a hard time. He didn't judge, didn't berate, didn't do anything to coerce me into leaving. The decision was all mine. I just needed a friendly voice and a shoulder to cry on, someone to treat me like a human being rather than a door mat to wipe his feet on when he thought I was worthy of such treatment (which was all the time). We parted ways several years ago but I will ALWAYS be grateful to him for the HUGE part he played in my reemergence into the world of humanity!

It sounds like you're finding what you need to get out Merxill. Many hugs and give me a shout if you need a shoulder, a friendly ear or a kick in the pants although, admittedly, NeonKaos is better at the kick in the pants .
There are as many ways to do polyamory as there are people practicing it!
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