The problem being that those who are not aware of our lifestyle and do not understand it simply see me (and my partner) as being completely selfish and wanting the best of both worlds. I don't believe many can comprehend that way of thinking, thats why we mostly leave our personal life to ourselves. Having feelings for this man as I do has pushed our personal life into the forefront due to the fact that we won't be able to hide what we are doing forever, from everyone.
My partner and I don't have trust issues and we have full disclosure of most, I am just deciding how to bring this situation out into the open without causing a rift in their friendship or our entire dynamic. I dont want to muddle things. I suppose that IS what might happen and one has to be prepared for things not to go their way but that is still my biggest fear.