Originally Posted by YGirl
I think there is a deluded sense that things "should" be equal... but as George Orwell wrote, "some are more equal than others".
Some people beat themselves up trying to "force" equality rather than achieving said "equality" by letting the "Un-equality" exist and run its course.
I think how we define equality is the issue. I prefer to think of things as "fair" rather than equal. Fairness is more along the lines of "equal opportunity to have my needs met in a relationship". Knowing that my needs are not going to be the same as other people's needs and that there is always going to be a balance. However, in that balancing act, my needs are being taken into consideration rather than being trumped by the needs or insecurities of another partner.
(and I see nothing wrong with with topics showing up in more than one thread....there are always differences and nuances, and there has never been a perfectly compartmentalized forum in the history of the internet)