Yesterday was a great day for me and the wife, went to the beach to help her parents with the cottage. A day filled with laughter and love. Today woke alone in bed and I knew where she was, upstairs with the friend. All my emotions came running back, why can I not remove these feelings? Why do I feel so alone in this? She is going away on vacation this week, I am sure it is to decompress from all that is going on in our lives right now. I tried to get her to talk the other night but she just shut down on me. I needed her to talk about her fears in this but she just does not want to talk about these things. Maybe I think it would help me if I knew shehad the same fears as I do, or if she has any fears about this. I find myself sitting alone in our apartment like a benched player waiting to be called into the game. Do any other Monos feel this way?