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Old 06-09-2011, 04:45 PM
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BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
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Originally Posted by vixtresses View Post
What if I just simply told my attraction that "Guess, what? I was feeling a little hesitant about all our cuddling and spending time together because I wasn't sure about how DF would feel about it, and I talked to him, and he's actually perfectly fine with it!" Without a whole schpiel about polyamory and relationships and stuff... I mean, depending on how he reacted to that, it could come up anyway, but maybe I don't have to bring it up? Or am I just trying to avoid Real Discussions? Gah. I don't know. More thinking.
I actually rather like your phrasing right there. It leaves the whole 'what is this, this thing we are not having atm?' question aside, and leaves room for his response, whatever that might be.

Originally Posted by vixtresses View Post
I guess I'm in a hurry because I do have this pre-existing attraction to someone, and DF does not, which is unfair.
Well, life often is. Your attraction to OG happened, and you want to explore that, and rather than put that on hold for who knows how long a time while DF is prowling, you need to work out a plan/schedule on how are you going to progress. Continuing to hang out with him with no foreseeable future will only place you in temptation to cross boundaries and eff up the good start you're having.

Originally Posted by vixtresses View Post
Well... He's still wanting me to hold on, but he's already looking. He just doesn't expect to find anybody anytime soon, if at all, so he doesn't think that the fact that he's looking means we should actually *start* "being poly".
Erm, him looking means you have started . It's a two-way street, after all.
Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
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