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Old 10-07-2009, 10:03 PM
Ceoli Ceoli is offline
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: London, UK
Posts: 900

Originally Posted by HappiestManAlive View Post
Absolutely. And she knows the rest of it too - the part you chose not to quote, that includes her in the happiness/love/gratitude circle of increasing emotion and love.

Because it goes around like that, every increase in feeling for one results in an increase for the other, which results in an increase for the other, and back and forth and around. Nobody is loved "more" than ayone else - because when they are, we feel more lov for the ret through it. Nobody gets left out, averyone builds and builds. It's amazing.

Last night was a perfect example of this phenomanon; I truly feel sorry for people who don't have it.
I chose to quote the part I was trying to understand more. Didn't see it as necessary to quote the other stuff.

That's wonderful that you have that arrangement and that it's working out for you. Just keep in mind that people who don't have that may not always need to be felt sorry for. It just might not be the right kind of arrangement that meets their needs.

I know that for myself, in a closed polyfi triad, when I hear that one partner needs the reassurance that they will be loved slightly more than the other partner in order to feel comfortable, it would not be something I'd be comfortable with. I have no problem with that kind of dynamic in a V though even then I prefer to think of it as loving each partner differently, not more or less. That may not be what you meant by it, but I find it difficult to translate what you said in any other way. Either way, what's good for the goose is not always good for the gander.

But seriously, it's fantastic that it's working out for you and I really do wish you the best of luck!
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