Originally Posted by redpepper
Frankly, there is a lot more to life than poly and I am content to be settled in and doing other things. Does that make me less poly? I dunno... I wonder.
If its enough, its enough and rather than continuing to clamor for more that I can't fit in anyway, then it makes me think that poly isn't for me... I guess because those I see around me are clamoring it seems and are poly... ? Poly seems to be a lot about clamoring... clamoring to understand, be accepted, to find others, etc....
I don't clamor to "get" anything right now, so it makes me feel un-poly. I feel accepted, understood, have found others.... its all good. In a sense, poly in the clamoring sense of it, is not for me.
I totally get why when a tribe settles in they disappear off the radar. It becomes so unimportant that I identify as poly and so much more important that I just get about the business of living that I become uninterested in paying attention to my community.
My sentiments exactly. I don`t clamour, or handle things the way many seem to. Others trying to force-feed me their brand of life, had me bitter.
My compassion had come to a stand-still.
Pulling myself away, and back,... I am finding my compassionate side again. That is important to me. I much prefer being my well-rounded self.
I don`t know what to tell you about the 'poly' label. For me, it is a label I have come to currently reject.
People will tell you, that you are 'poly' based on what they SEE, and those physical actions upholding their own beliefs.
However, I think it`s something you have to feel akin to deep inside. What does poly mean to you ? What is the unshakable truth that lies in you ?
I think it is ok to NOT identify as anything. If you feel your relationships are as a normal family
, and possibly resent the 'zoo' like peering through, from others, it makes sense to need a break from that. (This thought is hard to put to words, please forgive.) The very basic truth is you are a family. you love, you live, you have ups and downs. being cast as different can get old. Maybe you are feeling that ? There is nothing wrong with dropping a label. Especially if it makes you feel you have to 'uphold' some greater good for others.
All rambling aside,..sometimes we just need to look after ourselves, and our loves. Live life without over-thinking it. Fuck the rest for awhile.