You hit the nail on the head a number of times. I don't want to ask her to delete a night, because I really don't think "my issues" are grounded in reality - I think I'm creating, subconsciously, these "problems" to get something (though I don't know what). We did, however, just spend an absolutely fabulous evening, both apart and together. First, I have a standing activity with E (we're both into firearms and military history, so we go shooting twice a week), so she took the time to go out to dinner with our daughter. Much needed mom/girl time. I shot horribly, but E and I hadva good time. Then, she and I laid in bed and just talked - no jealousy, accusations, blame, anger - just laughed, told stories, talked about Zen (which I drifted away from), talked about E and her from a compassionate place, and talked about things she and I want to do together.
She's spending Saturday night with E, and I'm going to work out and then do something else for my enjoyment. Sunday she and I are going to E's to hang out and maybe have a threesome (which, btw, gives me no problems).
I'm in a much better place now. I still need to work on my issues, but it helps tremendously to realize I really am ok the way I am. I just want to break some bad emotional habits. :-)
Edit: oh, and she and I have a date tonight.
Last edited by LostSailor; 06-03-2011 at 05:12 AM.
Reason: Forgot something...