Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG
That kind of freedom is not the goal of everyone as odd as that sounds.
If you don't think it' a constructive way to be in a relationship right now than you have answered your own question I think.
Honestly-that was my exact response emotionally.
On the other hand-I get the idea that there is generally a way to make something work even if it seems impossible.... so maybe there is a way around this so you can be ok NOW in the relationship you are in... I'm not sure what it is... but I think maybe what you might consider is not worrying about hte what if's unless they become issues.
I know maca is terrible about what if'ing something to death and making himself miserable over things that never even come to pass. ...... in order to accept a poly relationship with me he can't focus on "what if she finds someone better." Because that will scare him out of taking the chance, so the what if will cause the demise of his marriage and love.... but if he lets it go-the truth (as I know it) is that he won't ever get to that point so everything will blossom beautifully for him-as it appears to be doing right now!
So maybe let up on the what if of the future possibility of him finding someone who is mono and just live for today with him.