Originally Posted by River
You've just said that you love both of them and are in love with both of them, simultaniosly. That means that you are polyamorous -- since you're also honest about it with them. It's not like you've been cheating.
This! Frankly, as someone who is trying to avoid a divorce, relationships whether mono or poly are full of emotional turmoil and sometimes it's extremely hard to know if they are worth the effort or not.
If you do breakup with your boyfriend and "commit" to your girlfriend, will you be happy? Will her friends all of a sudden like you or will they find other things to complain about? Why is she letting her friends fight her battles?
Do you really LOVE her more than you do your boyfriend (who you have dated a year longer) or is the NRE wearing off with the boyfriend while it's still in full force with the girlfriend? It's very possible that the realtionship has just run it's course.
The situation with your girlfriend and her friends sounds a bit strange to me. She knew you had a boyfriend when you started dating and now she expects you to dump him for her. This strikes me WRONG, like the mistress who expects a man to divorce his wife to just be with her and when he doesn't, she has her friends tell him he is breaking her heart. What other things in your life will this happen with? If she doesn't get along with your friends, will she (or her friends) expect you to dump them too? What about family or activites?