Originally Posted by Derbylicious
I hate that in my mind I'm already reluctant to help her out if the time comes when she needs help. Things like this shouldn't be tit for tat.
Does her actions not set a president? I would assume she is good with what she has and doesn't need your help. Its not up to you to keep tabs on what her needs are anyway. If hubby wants to help when the time comes then that's his choice no?
The way I look at it is in terms of what I can do to help my partner. If I see some way that would help them, or if they make a request I can help out with I do. Often it means helping my metamour and that is an added bonus. Maybe if she isn't interested in helping you out or paying any attention to your partners accident then you could think about how to support HIM if it comes up that she needs help.
The other thing is that perhaps they are not as invested in each other as you and I are or me and Mono or me and PN. People invest at different levels. They aren't the same as you in their love investment.