I would keep at it and realize that it took some time to find your husband, so this likely will too. Why would you want to rush into something that is meant to be fulfilling, beneficial and positive in your life. These things take time. A lot of time sometimes.
When I went through my "dating" phase I enjoyed every moment, even if it was sometimes difficult and even damaging to my "self." It was all important and all a learning experience. Going through it is important to find the right person... I wouldn't settle, but keep exploring and seeing what comes up.
It might help to find a local poly group where you are, or create on. There is nothing like finding like minded people to be around for something real to develop. At the very least there will be others of like mind around to feel connected to.
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