Originally Posted by girluv4u
hi, i'm new to polly and have a question... does secondary always mean last? are secondary's alway the one to be bumped? i dont mind being bumped but is it to much to ask for to just once to NOT be the one being bumped?
Well, if the person is actually defined
as secondary, then I suppose they would, by definition, come after the primary
But some poly relationships strive to be non-hierarchical, and therefore no one is defined as being first or second or third, ect. Rather, everyone is defined
as being equally important, although perhaps for different reasons and in different ways. Of course, this is the ideal and it does not necessarily work out that way even for people who strive for that.
How many times have you gotten "bumped", considering you said you are new to poly? Are the other people poly or serial non-monogamists? What do you consider to be poly?