Wow. This is not a cuckolding situation. It is not a matter of physical satisfaction. Some kegel exercise routines and she should be able to have as much sex as she wants, with either of us, without a problem.
It is the emotional wound that has a problem. We are having a really hard time reconnecting with each other. It has left us very tender. We are usually excellent communicators, but our attempts to talk this one out so far haven't worked.
The hurt is coming from the physical inability to please one another. We are both very sexual, physical communicators, so it is almost as if our tongues have been cut out.
Right now the only thing I can think of is let time heal. Spend some time apart. Let us both sort of regroup before approaching each other again - unless anyone has any suggestions on how to go about the conversation.