Thread: SlutWalk
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Old 05-17-2011, 08:53 AM
Aisling Aisling is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Wellington, New Zealand
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What a woman wears is not the central issue in this instance, it is more the greater communities view of rape, guilt, and provocation.

If a woman is out drinking with friends, wearing close fitting or revealing clothing and gets raped she first asks herself. Am I going to get blamed for this? I was a. drinking and b. wearing revealing clothing therefore as stated in an earlier post will people assume I was asking for it? (feel free to replace any of the above with such situations as walking home alone, enjoying myself, being a woman etc)

It is this thought pattern that is the dangerous one as all rape victims are firstly judged on who they are rather than what happened to them. It means that rapes are under reported as many women who drink and/or have had casual sexual encounters in the past are likely to persue the matter knowing that alot of people will think 'she was asking for it'.

A woman may attempt to attract the attention of the other sex, but this in no way means that her rights should be taken away. It is not ok to say a woman in this situation is any less brutalised or degraded by what happened than if she was wearing conservative clothing.

Slutwalk is attempting to say that it doesn't matter what a woman wears, if her choice is taken away it is crime and the punishment should not be lessened or her pain be less important on the basis of what she is wearing.

Personally, this happened to me, I enjoyed sex and on a night out with friends met a friend of a friend and I went home with him. It was consentual in the begining but when he started hurting me and wouldn't let me leave it was not. I struggled, i asked him to stop but I was hurting and scared so I didn't fight as much as I should of. Instead I retreated hoping he would finish quickly and leave.

I never reported it because I had been drinking and it had started out consentual, I knew my history would come into and I didn't want to put myself on trial to prove his guilt. The few friends I told didn't understand, I got told but he was 'hot' so it couldn't be that bad and he had been in a bad place at the time. If my friends couldn't understand why would anyone else?

For months I was scared to be around male friends, jumping or crying if they tried to touch me. I hid from everyone went on antidepressants and anti anxiety meds and could not leave the house by myself. Over the last 5 years things slowly got better, I got of medication, can leave the house by myself and I have rediscovered some of my previous self worth.

But I still find it difficult to meet strange men and to this day I do not drink to excess and only if I have a 'guardian' to stay with at all times. And for the longest time I fought with myself because 'I must have deserved it'.

For all those who consider what a woman wears dictates the severity of the crime. What would someone think if a poly woman with multiple male partners is raped by a stranger (or a friend), is she tarred with the same brush as someone in tight clothing? She too is advertising that she is sexually available and capable of servicing a mans needs.

This is why rape is a horrible crime, it severly affects the victim, who for the most part is judged before the attackers guilt is assertained. It is the mind set of the community that needs to change, there will always be predators who will attack regardless of social status, clothing, appearance, sexual orientation etc. But it is how their crime is judged and how the victim is treated that can be changed.

Sorry - end rant
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