Originally Posted by XYZ123
My husband is like a child sometimes too. Often, actually. Since I stopped working I've been doing everything in the household, which I truly don't mind. But it's when I give him that one little thing I need done and three days later it's still sitting there and then I do it finally and he goes "I was just gonna". Ugh. Today I actually finally let him have it and am boycotting doing anything else I have asked him to do because I don't ask for alot.
Oh, I see, I am not alone. I have similar strategies. tell him once and wait. But as you said, very often it does not get done. if it is not important, never mind, if it is I will do it and if someoneelse offers help i'll take it from someone else (mainly my parents).
From what I feel and here in the discussion it is the trust issue that needs to be rebuilt. And that is a BIG issue. I am optimist and I have enough general trust in life to see the possibility, but I also see that is a HUGE amount of work to get all these little deceptions healed and to be honest my big fear is that he is NOT aware of the amount of repair work that he has to do. Taking the kids for a walk once or tidying in stuff in the room does not prove a change in attitude, just a temporary good will. It might be a change if it lasts for quite a while. I may seem paranoic, it is in fact quite deceiving to take these momentary actions as change in attitude and find out later, that a lot of the rest goes on as usual. i guess it is a long work period for all and it is necessary to work on all the details. I wish he saw that as well!!!