Originally Posted by Beodude123
I still come here... Just don't have much to say anymore.
Don't sink into the swamp, Man! Don't bottle all this up. It's positive to get things off your chest, even if it's uncomfortable at the time. [But I'm glad to read that you're keeping an eye on this thread.
I want to ask you a question. Jen writes:
We went from having very good communication (pre-poly), to have a surge of incredible mind blowing communication.... I was so happy that I had this amazing connection with my hubby and we could discuss everything with no judgements... to BAM. Nothing.
Do YOU see it like that? Do you feel that your communication with Jen / sex-life with her / marriage in general actually IMPROVED [for a while] after the polyamory cards were laid on the table?
I ask you this because
a) if it IS true, wouldn't you like to get back to that improvement?
b) if it ISN'T true, you and Jen need to start communicating with each other better. Have a close look [both
of you] at Ariakas'
signature. I LOVE that quote from Shaw! I don't want to give you the impression that I'm a total drug fiend but here comes my 2nd drug-related comment on this thread:
A few friends of mine (DECADES ago) all took some LSD on the Scottish coast. After a few hours, when one of them [D] returned from a long walk along the beach, I asked her how it had gone. "AMAZING!!!
Even though we split up physically, A, B, and I [D] have been in constant CONTACT, you know? Perfect communication even though we were physically far apart!"
When A and B returned, I asked them about this amazing communication / connection that had been going on between the 3 of them. It was complete news to THEM...
If Jen was on some amazing high in that "surge of incredible mind blowing communication"
while you were undergoing torture, I think that the two of you need to talk about that.
to hope that a) is true, and that you want to recapture that [natural] high with Jen.
As always, all the best to both of you!