He doesn't feel like he's making any progress, talking about it or not talking about it. He understands the concept of Poly, but he can't seem to stop being illogical when he thinks about it. It's always negative thoughts. He gets angry, depressed.... and this is without any active poly going on. This is just the IDEA of poly.
Every time we start to have a conversation, if I keep reassuring him, which I have been doing, it never gets through his head. If I tell him how I feel, it's always taken the wrong way, negatively of course.
We went from having very good communication (pre-poly), to have a surge of incredible mind blowing communication.... I was so happy that I had this amazing connection with my hubby and we could discuss everything with no judgements... to BAM. Nothing. Communication ends negatively, no matter how positive it started. Every time I keep thinking we might be making some progress, he spirals down into this depressive pissed off state, which is not like him.
It's like nothing I can say or do has a positive outcome. I just keep my mouth shut, and try and do everything I can to make this all easier for him, because I know it's hard. But I'm getting exhausted from the lack of progress.