Thread: Am i poly?
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Old 05-13-2011, 02:06 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
I think we are just bored with our marriage...
Not a good reason to get involved with someone else on a relationship/love level, but it seems all you really want is sex. Still, it would be better to look at why you're so bored with each other, because adding people to the mix involves a certain other element - people! People with feelings and desires, who may not wish to be used just to keep someone else's life interesting. Put yourself in their shoes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
I am infatuated with someone at a distance now and eventually want to get together with him twice a year out of state for a fuck buddy session. We assumed fucking friends of ours would make everything more complicated.
Well, yeah, human beings are complicated creatures, but fucking friends could be really satisfying, depending on your friends, of course, and what you really want. I would think being with friends would be great for developing close, loving relationships. But it seems you're not after that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
We realize you can love more than one person just not sure how to incorporate that into our relationship or maybe we will eventually figure we want to be single and just fuck whoever we want whenever we want, now that sounds great!!
Maybe you should find some swinging communities or clubs. It definitely sounds like you are mostly interested in recreational sex where emotions are kept at bay, rather than polyamory. Polyamory is ethical non-monogamy, where everyone is aware, consents, and is honest about what's going on, but the focus is love, not just sex.

You should definitely do some reading. There's a thread of book recommendations somewhere here.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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