Thread: Am i poly?
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Old 05-12-2011, 11:00 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
I am in a 20 yr marriage to a wonderful man. we decided we both could have a separate relationship once or twice a year with someone else
A relationship once or twice a year? That's an odd way of defining a relationship. Doesn't really sound like a relationship is what you want at all. It just sounds like you're talking only about extramarital sex.

Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
Rules: no friends, no bringing them home, be safe, don't flaunt other person, etc. Does this qualify as polyamory?
Not really.

A pity you aren't allowed to fuck your friends.

Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
We are extremely private and he doesn't want to know about my fling and i don't want to know about his. I feel so much better tho just knowing i can, like a huge burden is lifted and that i may be attractive to someone else so it has made me more focused on me which i like.
Ah, so you are talking about just sexual flings. With an, "eh, what he doesn't know won't hurt him" approach. Wouldn't that still feel like cheating in a way? Wouldn't you begin to wonder about the people he's involved with?

Originally Posted by P4ME View Post
Also not sure how to proceed with making sure I am safe. require test results? help!
Yes, for both of you, and ask to see the paperwork! Of course, you both should USE CONDOMS!
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

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