We took a break.
Mind you, 10 yrs ago, we weren`t in a 'poly' or open relationship so to speak. We called it 'exclusive swinging'
Poly was a word associated with those misfit polygamists,(in our minds back then) and we didn't want to be associated that way.
When I became pregnant with my daughter, ( not long after losing a baby at 5 months gestation) I pulled away. Wanted to do things 'right'. I was scared of being caught, outed, whatever. Scared something I did, caused my loss.
So it was my doing. Of course it didn`t make sense in hindsight. I was grieving, and made choices that were permanent.
If I knew then what I know now,... I would of kept the relationships going, and given the people we cared about, a chance to prove they were capable, trustworthy people, who wouldn't make silly mistakes at our expense.
I didn`t give them that chance. Most definitely,..my bad.
So today,..we still have no wish to be outed, or in the open. That will always be. However, we give people a chance to prove they are on board with us. If it`s not quite fitting right,..there are other options, and we can date away from home.