View Single Post
Old 05-09-2011, 07:45 PM
BlackUnicorn's Avatar
BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 906

A person very near and dear to me expressed their disappointment over my chosen way of life. They said how they had always thought I shared their family values and high moral standards, which include respect for monogamy. I asked if they truly thought monogamy is the cornerstone of both family values and morality, and they said, to a large degree, yes.

I asked them if it was better then to cheat on one's partner on the sly. They asked back if I thought it was better to kill somebody with a gun or with a knife. I didn't get the comparison. Cheating is wrong; polyamory is consensual non-monogamy, and if everyone wants it, moreover seeks it out, I can't really understand how that could be a priori unethical. If someone who could be poly cheats it is not a failure of polyamory, not even necessarily of monogamy as a very valid and for some people totally workable life choice; it is failure of visibility, education and support for people to come to terms with who they are and to learn that there are options other than misery and mayhem for them (and no, I don't want to convert anyone, or think it is our duty to convert others to poly - I just think everyone who is able to be out should be, just like I think GLBT and other members of alt sex cultures should be as out as possible).

So the conversation ended with them saying 'I don't want to hear anything that is related to this sickness of yours. I am only able to tolerate you in my vicinity if I pretend that it doesn't exist'. Well, gee, if that is not a sure way to invite an ongoing poly-monologue from me I don't know what is. The only way to normalize this 'sickness' of mine, to show that people who are happy and sane can and do enjoy this, is to keep on talking about it.
Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
Reply With Quote