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Old 05-06-2011, 10:48 PM
marksbabygirl marksbabygirl is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Squamish, BC
Posts: 790
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I agree - monogamy is 'easier' if you're not already in love with 2.

Monogamy is 'easier' if you have a lot of social/family pressures.

Monogamy is 'easier' if you have a lot of time constraints.

Relationships happen though - and its all about learning to communicate and work effectively within them.

I'm not in any other romantic relationships at this point - although I am half in love with someone...however that relationship will always always be what it appears to be. (yeah convoluted) But anyhow - my point.

I practice my communication skills on my friends and 'non-romantic' relationships because with better communication skills, I'll be able to mitigate any disasters from happening - not that I have control over someone else's lack of communication/maturity - but I will be able to say with clarity - "This isn't working for me. We need to find a workable solution that helps us ALL meet our needs"

Otherwise you have 3 or more people reacting emotionally without communicating effectively and everyone gets hurt.

So practice. Practice communication, practice being clear in what you need and want, and if a poly opportunity arises, you'll be more prepared.

But no, choosing monogamy is not the easy way out - you still have to work just as hard at communication for an effective monogamous relationship as you do for an effective poly relationship.
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