Originally Posted by amuk
I feel the comment about not understanding why you aren't constantly surrounded by women to be rather condescending...as if if is some fault of your own that you aren't.
I rather understood it as an attempt to encourage cuddlecakes
, to make him feel that he is
attractive. Is that condescending? Maybe. [shrugs]
: I've just read your 6 comments on your thread, "Hello"
and it really seems to me that you need to work on this insecurity/contest issue.
I also think that you should pay attention to redpepper
's comment. I wonder if your gf is really poly (does she actually define herself as such?), a flirter - giddy with the freedom of a new date 4 times a week or whatever - or a swinger, hopping into (and out of) as many beds as possible. For me, poly implies emotional attachment. This seems to be important to you, too, and is probably why you're moving much more slowly than her.
This isn't meant as a criticism of her. If she wants to swing, is careful about protection, and you're OK with that [in principle] then that's your [plural] business. And maybe she is
investing emotions into all those other relationships. What the hell do I know? But I think that you [singular] do
have to stop using her as a measuring stick... and then beating yourself with that stick.