Originally Posted by RfromRMC
Very glad to read that y'all are hangin' in there!
I'll add one bit about jealousy...it never fully goes away. But what really helps for me is to stop and think "Is this jealousy coming out of selfishness?" And you know what? For me, 9 times outta 10, it is!
I struggle with jealousy sometimes and being the girlfriend of 2 married people, I do feel left out sometimes because there are things they share within their relationship that I am not and will never be part of, just like there are things that I share with each one of them individually. It is very natural to want all of your lover's attention but you have to learn to rationalize and really look at the validity of your feelings when you AND your lover have more than one lover. So I have learned to do the same thing....I've learned to step back and say..."Is this legitimate or am I being insecure and selfish?" and most of the time I am just being selfish. It's like, I want my time alone with each of them and with all of us together, but I get jealous when they have time alone? How silly is that? Me being with them alone or together doesn't make them love each other any less, so why would spending time alone without me make them love me any less? It doesn't! If anything, it makes them miss me, which isn't always such a bad thing when you all come back together
ALSO, I am with two people that remind me daily how much they love me and do their best to never make me feel left out of anything in their life. In reality, 90% of the time, I'm getting double the attention, not half....so in the end...the amount of love and attention I receive far out weighs those temporary moments of jealousy and insecurity.