Originally Posted by live4themusic
I am having a really hard time accepting this situation. Should I compromise my beliefs in polyamorous potential in order to mend my relationship with Mary, or would that just be setting us up for disaster down the line? Should I just get over her and hope that I might one day meet someone else I could love as much as I love her (which at this point seems kind of hopeless to me)?
Going against your nature is definitely a road to disaster and more than one broken heart down the line. Do not deny your heart! Get over her in a romantic sense but if there was a good friendship there it would be worth salvaging wouldn't it?
Relationships don't have to be all or nothing. Lots of people survive break-ups and remain friends. Of course there are others that end peacefully and just drift apart and then others that are transformed from love to hate.
If she will be living in fear of even the possibility for you falling in love with someone else, it will be next to impossible for her to move forward. Make sure she is honest with herself when the moment of what next comes up. If she denies her heart disaster will also likely follow and you both could be a lot deeper in love.