She lied to you, but thinks she hasn't done anything wrong.
Orginal transgression aside, she LIED to you. And now stands by her decision to do so. She was not protecting your feelings, she was covering her own ass.
Now she is playing mind games with you, and (from what you've written) shows no sign of stopping any time soon. Be warned, BrotherMan, that as long as that behavior works for her she will continue it. If you want her to change that behaviour, you have to change your response to it.
Sorry if that's not what you want to hear, but the thing is what it is. But you deserve to be treated with respect, love and consideration.
I sincerely wish you well as you face this challenge.