last question. do you feel that poly relationships are more of the sharing kind? by that, I mean to say the type where partners share information with each other freely. and have you ever seen a poly relationship that was the opposite and successful?
If nothing else anywhere in this thread comes to anything at all, let it be said that this sentence right here is what it's all about, poly relationship aside. In order for ANY relationship to work - to REALLY work and "be all it can be" - it needs to have open communiction. When Violet and I even THINK we MIGHT be harboring something or left something out or "accidentally" lied, we grab the other one and talk it out. Sound silly? It has changed my life. Radically. The single biggest obstacle in our developing relationship with Anne is getting her comfortable with this concept. People talk about communicating and total honesty, and I can say now with absolute confidence that the VAST majority of them have no idea what they're talking about! It is SO HARD - and it is SO WORTH IT. And as it applies specifically to aa poly relationship - well, it's plumb necessary. Mono relationships can struggle on and limp along in one way or another (been there, done that, many times) more easily than most poly arrangements; there are fewer points of view and possible points of contention. A poly relationship is a LOT of work, requiring great deal of personal sacrifice to attain the AWESOME upside.