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Old 04-25-2011, 07:12 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,672
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Hello, I live with my two loves and although the sleeping arrangements are different, we still operate in terms of a team. When we have conflicts of any significant measure, we use our Non-violent communication skills... you can look in the "communication workshop" thread to find out more or do a search on your favourite search engine.. I think its a sticky? or do a tag search for communication.

Basically the theory of NVC is based on empathy/consideration/compassion for those you are communicating with. Staying in control of selfish emotions and using a dash of sarcastic humour really does wonders for us. Everything is out in the open pretty much all the time. I ask the guys constantly how they are doing, if they feel they are spending enough time with me, and make plans well into the future that are fluid and give us something to look forward to.

As to household decisions? Well, that is a longer process, but comes from the same way of speaking to each other, checking in to what their thoughts are and negotiating constantly.

Have you looked around your community to see if you can find a group to hook up with? Maybe start your own group? Even if you put the word out and get a few people to go out for a drink one night a month, that would be something to start on. I'm a full believer in creating what would sustain myself in life. If I need something, I create it. If you need support, figure out how you would like to see that manifest and do it.

Anyway, you have us here. Maybe that is enough for now?
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