Yup, the time will very soon come for me to say that no matter what he is thinking or wants to commit to, I cannot marry him on that day. I wanted it to be mutual for the sake of future possibilities in our relationship. I wanted to wait until after the therapy session that I hope he will join me in. I'm going to the therapist whether he is or not.
I'll check out Al-Anon. I will go today if I can.