So... It's been a while since I was last on here and would like to send a special thanks to redpepper. And I'm still working on that whole situation. : ) patience, right?
Ok so here are some new developments...in my primary rationship I was the one to bring up poly because of my need to fill a void that has to do with me being bi. Now my boyfriend/fiancÚ/partner, not sure how to phrase that, has been kinda shopping around for women... Now I always thought that the whole poly thing was just going to be on my end and so I am desperately trying not to be the jealous hippocrite. But he says that he just has a need to have sex...not really have a whole separate relationship, with another woman. Like I said before, we talk about everything. Now I'm stuck with the feeling that he's tying to replace me... And I know that if he was bi and looking for a guy, I'd feel different. When we talked about it he said that he wanted to because I was able to date women and why couldn't he...and then I said that if he wanted to date women then I should be able to date guys too. Then he said he didn't want me to. My goal has always been to try and find a unicorn. But I think all he wants to do is mess around with permission. Now he doesn't want to do that because I would be dating guys... Now, not that I'm looking for a guy but if I did find one he wouldn't be happy about it...but now I feel like I'm stopping him from being a swinger...if in fact that is what he wants. How can the green eyed monster arise when I am dating?
I know... Childish right? Scattered... I know.... Let me know ur thoughts on all this and if u don't really understand all of it, questions are welcome.
Now writing this, it all seems very childish. But relationships grow and change...but are they supposed to change with every conversation?